What are you looking at? Never seen a Vegas dancer with no arms before?

name: jenna
occupation: vegas dancer
what she's saving up for: cheek implants

Would he prefer Norma or La Traviata? Let's see.

name: alma
occupation: botanist
what she's doing tonight: taking a a small bonsai to one of two operas

That's a cute guy. I wonder if he's on Match.

name: lucrecia
occupation: professional match.com dater
where she lives: her grandma's spare room, which she pays for with nightly boxes of leftover fancy dinner

You never know when you're gonna need to mark somebody.

name: arthur
occupation: junior varsity soccer player
what he always carries with him: a sharpie

If only I could find one of those hard plastic bristle brushes.

name: elisa
occupation: magazine intern
hair philosophy: barbie knew what was up

I don't know if he's into flannel or boho-chic, and I'm not taking any chances.

name: claire
occupation: straight-A fashion student
her secret to success: make sure the teacher likes your outfit

I feel better I think.

name: naomi
occupation: music therapist
what she did last night: listened to "purple rain" until 3 am

If I raise my left leg to here, can you see my underwear?

name: eloise
occupation: lounge singer
what she practices daily: her lying-on-top-of-the-piano position

I bet I can get the teacups one at a time. Saucers are a cinch.

name: chester
occupation: works in private library for a multi-millionaire
what's behind his back: the bernardaud teapot he's stealing for his boyfriend

God, it's almost like there's a spider.

name: francesca
occupation: b-list celebrity stylist
current problem: trying to be cool but has an itch right between her shoulderblades

I just came from the hospital, sorry, didn't have time to wash this off.

name: mara
occupation: volunteer hospital clown
perpetual first-date faux pas: always shows up half in costume

Take the shot before I pass out.

name: jennifer
occupation: catalog model
daily struggle: finds her job painfully exhausting

That Richard Simmons is such a hack.

name: winona
occupation: jazzercize teacher
ambition: to become a bigger star than olivia newton john

Would Shakespeare and Imhotep have gotten along?

name: alexis
occupation: theater director
next production: macbeth set in an egyptian pyramid with an all-female cast

I smell skin ... quick, where's my purse?

name: tina
occupation: mother of three boys
crutch: wears too much scented body lotion

The new Prince Eric is so talented.

name: doris
occupation: costumed character at eurodisney
believability as cinderella on a scale of one to ten: 7

I don't care if they see the price tag if it's over $200.

name: alistair
occupation: junior executive at an athletic shoe company
how he saves money: never takes price tags off what he wears and returns everything

Act natural.

name: cleo
occupation: petty thief
what's in her jacket right now: a microwave

Why do I always feel like tap dancing when I'm waiting for the elevator?

name: eva
occupation: owner and sole contributor to a fledgling fashion blog
previous occupation: professional jazz dancer

Is that a double dark chocolate mocha fudge cake? God!

name: annabel
occupation: screenwriter
what she's working on: losing five pounds

Susie looks a little plump and Mary's cheeks are rosy...

name: lila
occupation: charm school professor
source of anxiety: always worried her students are pregnant